


forever the name on my lips.

by honiedwonder



Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV 2020)
Genre: Drabble Collection, F/M, First Kiss, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Last Kiss, will end in tears just warning you
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-14
Updated: 2021-03-13
Packaged: 2021-03-22 00:46:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,202
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30030438
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/honiedwonder/pseuds/honiedwonder
Summary: every important kiss shared between julie and her ghost.orfour firsts and one last.
Relationships: Julie Molina/Luke Patterson
Comments: 3
Kudos: 33





	forever the name on my lips.

**Author's Note:**

> this chapter really is dedicated to luke patterson's adorable pout.

Nights like these didn't happen very often.

Truthfully, Julie was okay with that. She liked the chaos that those three phantoms had brought into her life. She enjoyed listening to their stories, hearing old songs, laughing about memories she wished that she had. 

(Her favorite things about them, however, were the new memories she'd made since they'd come into her life.)

There weren't many quiet nights like this one. And yes, that was okay.

… But she enjoyed the peace of nights like these just as much as the usual insanity.

It was no secret that the boys had much to catch up on in the 25 years they'd spent wandering that infamous dark room. The task itself was daunting, but Julie had taken it on as a project. Each one deserved a special recap. Reggie was most concerned with the Star Wars universe, so movie nights consisted of new episodes and lots of yelling. Thankfully, Julie was the only one who could truly hear the yelling, so her neighbors were none the wiser. Alex seemed more concerned with pop culture, which had been a more difficult task, but she was doing her best. Fashion trends, language, celebrities… it was like an entire lifetime had passed without them. Believe it or not, downtime between the two was spent absorbing reality television like a sponge while usually talking over the drama on the screen. It was easy to talk to Alex; weightless and carefree. He wasn't so much concerned with what he'd missed, but how to be caught up. How to fit into this new puzzle.

Luke was another, much more complex, story. 

Where Reggie was excited and Alex was eager, Luke was contemplative. Judgmental. The weight of this self-made project was heavy on her shoulders. Welcoming Luke Patterson into the 21st century of music was daunting. Every time he placed an earbud in his ear, she stopped breathing.

Her lungs hadn't been prepared for this project. 

Julie had gotten better at it with time. She learned what he liked and what he didn't like. 

(The Foo Fighters reopened the wound he hadn't really ever closed - _may Kurt Cobain rest in peace_. He did enjoy Panic! at the Disco, and was appalled to hear the controversy from Alex. He had also taken a liking to Taylor Swift, but made it quite clear that he wasn't ready to admit it yet.)

Julie found herself making playlists between classes, jotting down ideas in the corners of her notebook, and humming the chorus to an obscure song she needed to remember until she could bring it to him in the studio. 

There were a few playlists saved for quiet nights like these. Playlists that weren't meant to be shared with all of them. 

They'd been working on clearing out the loft for the last few weeks to give the guys more space in the garage. Her dad was happy to have the mess gone, and the band was happy to have a place to go when Carlos snuck out to use the bathroom. Julie was currently laying atop a pile of blankets spread over the wooden floor, earbud in her left ear and eyes closed. There's a tug on the chord attaching that earbud to her phone as the person occupying the other one snatches her phone from the space between them. The song changes abruptly, but it doesn't jar her. 

She's used to it.

Luke lays next to her, earbud in his right ear, though he's much less relaxed. He's holding her phone tightly above him - having learned quickly what it feels like to have it fall onto his face - and he's scrolling through the many lists she's curated. Julie recognizes the opening to Amy Winehouse's "Back to Black", but it must not have been the vibe he was going for because he skips it before she even begins singing. 

"You're indecisive today," Julie mumbles, just loud enough to hear over the soft music thrumming in their ears. 

Luke sighs before answering. He may or may not have been experiencing total cultural overload, and the best way he knew to cope was to continuously skip through the music until he found something familiar. _This wasn't it._

"It's just… a lot." His voice resembles more of a grumble when it reaches her ears, and she peeks an eye open to see a subtle pout developing on his lips. Brows furrowed, gaze focused. A smile rises to her lips and she reaches over to pluck her phone from his hands, bringing it to hover over her face, before he can skip another measure. 

"Hey! You said it was my turn to pick —"

"Yeah, well you're not picking anything. You're throwing a musical temper tantrum. Trust me."

He stifles a scoff that would have only further proved his point, though he can't help the eye roll. _But he stays quiet_. 

Julie scrolls through her playlists tab in search for the list she'd compiled for moments just like this. She has to scroll all the way to the bottom of the screen, the playlist itself virtually hidden. Kept for moments when it was needed. 

(It's just below the country playlist she'd made for Reggie, though that one was hidden for other reasons.)

Ah, there it is. Titled simply but effectively: _The Pout_.

Two quick clicks and the first song is playing softly between them. She places the phone down and in doing so, her arm brushes his. She truly doesn't mind; her eyes are trained on his expression simply to watch it melt. 

This was the playlist that had taken her the longest. She wanted to create something that felt like home. Luke truly was an open book, even when the words were jumbled and blurred. He wore every emotion on his face, in his eyes, the set of his shoulders. It was one of those faces you'd move mountains to console. She didn't have mountains, but she did have music.

And she'd spent hours cultivating the perfect playlist. Her search history probably looked bipolar.

_90's boy band_ \- The Backstreet Boys weren't exactly what she meant. Sunset Curve wasn't that type of band. 

_90s rock band_ \- a little too loud, a little too aggressive. This was supposed to tame the pout.

_90s soft rock_ \- those were the cheesy songs her dad sang to her mom when they were trying to be gross.

_90s hits_ \- a lot of Whitney, a lot of Britney. Not good enough for the pout. 

It had taken hours, but she'd finally done it. A mix of chill hits from then and now that would, hopefully, ease that stubborn line between his eyebrows.

The opening chords to "Soul to Squeeze" by the Red Hot Chili Peppers meets his ears and believe it or not, that line _deepens_. She locks her phone before he can catch a glimpse of the playlist title and places it back between them, looking to him with matched concern. Her arm is touching his, but she's too worried, too breathless to notice. 

"You can't be serious, you don't want to listen to this eith —"

"I wouldn't have pegged you as an Anthony Kiedis fan," he interrupts her before she has a chance to finish. Her expression softens, absolutely relieved, and she offers him a smile. 

"I know you think you know everything about me, but I regret to inform you that you don't _actually_ know it all."

A laugh escapes him before he catches it. It eases that line from between his brows and brings color back into his cheeks when they lift with a smile. "Ouch, Molina. You butter me up with RHCP and send me crashing right back down."

The music was but background noise as his real focus was her, but it did leave him feeling comfortably heavy. That feeling where you couldn't possibly lift a finger if you wanted to, but you couldn't imagine ever _needing_ to. A tempo fast enough to keep his blood pumping, but slow enough to keep him steady. Familiar, but watching her as the chorus played made it feel like he was hearing it for the first time. 

"We're all here to keep you humble," Julie retorts, quirking a playful brow in his direction. 

The song fades and the silence makes him aware of his other senses. He can still smell the dust from the boxes that used to lay here. He swears he can taste it too, but that might be a bit dramatic. Eyes are lifted to the ceiling, though if he looks just slightly to the side he can see a few unruly curls and skin that looks like caramel. He can feel the blankets beneath him, disguising the floor beneath them. He would like to think it's warm, but that's not really a feeling he was able to retain in this afterlife. 

But he does feel her skin against his. He tries to glance between them without being suspicious, but fails miserably. Touch would just have to do. 

Luke presses his arm against hers experimentally. He pretends not to hear the breath that Julie takes. 

Julie lifts a finger to graze his hand. She pretends not to see him stifle that crooked smile with his teeth. 

It doesn't come as a surprise when they both turn their palms face up — _waiting_.

It takes an awkward laugh, but Julie makes the move to slip her hand into his.

An entire song had passed during this game of back and forth, and a new melody floods his ears as Julie's fingers curl around his. He recognizes the tune, but not because it's his. This was most certainly hers. Luke is the first to break that silence. He squeezes her hand before he speaks.

"Is this that eyelash girl?"

A sound somewhere between a scoff and a laugh escapes her. "Eilish. Billie Eilish. And yes. I'll forgive you for butchering her name."

"Ocean Eyes" plays in their ears. The air around them is light, though if either of them knew that _both_ of them were thinking about the other's eyes… it might not have felt so weightless. 

Luke's eyes were more like a raging, blooming forest. Greenery that blew freely in the breeze and lit up beneath the blaze of the sun. Each storm that passes through him leaves a hazel cloud around his irises. Not quite the ocean, though equally mysterious. Julie's eyes, on the other hand, reminded him of hot chocolate. He knew how childish it was, and the lyricist within him cringed every time he thought of it, but it was the best he had. The warmth she possessed was out of this world, and he could see it in the swirling chocolate hues of her eyes. Salted caramel, dark chocolate. Much more intriguing than the ocean, if you asked him. 

Julie uses the hand she's holding to anchor herself as she turns on her side, facing him completely. 

"Do you like this song?" She asks. Curiosity is genuine. She wants to know if she did a good job.

As she knew he would, he takes a minute to think about it. The tempo, the harmonies. The layering of her voice. This eyelash girl had a haunting quality about her that intrigued him. Music was so… different now. The song would be over before he had a chance to criticize if he dwelled on it for too long. 

"Well, the lyrics are kick ass. _Burning cities and napalm skies_ , are you kidding? And the harmonies in the chorus are… so sick," his voice is hushed, afraid to break the peace of the atmosphere, but his review is genuine. It lights a smile that begins to grow on her lips as should looks at him, and her other hand takes the one she already has. She touches the rings on his fingers absentmindedly. The silver is cool against her skin, though that doesn't explain the goosebumps that rise over his.

"Her sound is amazing," Julie responds quietly, attention far more focused on the feeling of his hand in hers than the music fading to a close in her ear. Queen's "Love of my Life" begins to play and her gaze shoots up to his when a rather loud sigh leaves his lips. 

"What?" She doesn't do well at hiding the panic in her voice, worried that the playlist had already overstayed its welcome. 

"Nothing, nothing," He shooke his head, expression softening a bit when he sees the anxious edge in hers. It's humorless, but a chuckle powers his next sentence. "I just haven't heard this song in so long. Just reminds me of home, is all." 

And it did. The home that nurtured him, not the home that drove him away. Shuffling through his father's tapes, buying CDs with busking money, cutting the sleeves off of shirts his mother paid good money for.

Julie drops his hand and reaches for her phone, unlocking it quickly and moving to skip the song. "I'm sorry, we don't have to listen to it. I just thought —"

"Not so fast," It's his turn to rip that phone out of her hands. His head is turned, neck craned, to look to her incredulously. "No one said anything about skipping it. It's okay, really."

This entire experience really was a rollercoaster, wasn't it? She was so caught up in the relief fluttering in her chest to notice his fascination with the playlist that was open and brightly lit on the screen. 

He sits up so abruptly that the earbuds are ripped from both of their ears, forgotten between them. 

"Okay, hold on a second. You made an entire playlist, which has absolutely smashed by the way, and named it The Pout? You've got to be kidding me. Julie, you can't be serious." 

That stupid line between his brows is back. _Of course it is._

Julie throws her hands over her face to wallow in a single moment of embarrassment. She can feel the blush on her cheeks warm her palms, which only fuels the absolute horror she feels. This was exactly why it was at the bottom of the list! 

When she does sit up to face him, she's fairly certain time has started moving in slow motion. He's frozen, waiting for an explanation, and she's reluctant to even meet his gaze. With an audible groan, she rises until her legs are curled beneath her and she's leaned back against her heels. 

"I wouldn't have to be serious if you would stop looking like that." Her first defense leaves her lips in a whine. "I just hate it when you get upset, and I know that getting used to things here has been so crazy, so I just wanted to make something that might help."

(Had Julie been paying attention, she would have been able to see that pout completely melt from his face. He's biting his lip to hold back the smile fighting to give himself away, and that warmth in his chest is growing to envelope every limb he has. She might have even seen the way he instinctively leaned closer to her, but she was so caught up in her flustered defense to see any of the signs until they quite literally hit her in the face.)

"I know it's stupid, I just wanted to do something nice for — "

Let the record state that Luke Patterson could listen to Julie's voice all day if she asked. He never meant to interrupt her, to cut her off. But the record should also make note that Luke Patterson had memorized the curve of her lips with every sound she made and had been wondering what it would be like to kiss her for longer than he was proud of.

He surges forward, one hand falling to the base of her neck as a guide, and presses his lips against hers with a ghostly gentleness he hadn't known he possessed. He realizes as he swallows her breath of surprise exactly what he's done and pulls away from her with wide and glazed eyes. It's like looking in a mirror. Golden hues search his wildly, her lips still frozen and pursed. 

His hand hasn't yet left her skin. 

"I'm sorry. I really don't know why I did that; that was totally — "

_Now it's her turn_. 

Her mask of surprise thaws. A smile slides into the corners of her mouth before she closes the space between them. She leans forward onto her knees to press her lips back to his. It isn't necessarily something she knows how to do. She doesn't have anything to compare it to, but this too comes just as naturally with him as everything else has. 

When she pulls away and opens her eyes, his are still closed. She reaches forward to brush the pad of her thumb over the space just between his eyebrows and trails it down the bridge of his nose. It coaxes his eyes open, and he looks back at her in wonder. 

"You get a really deep line right here when you're upset. Especially when you're angry. I hate it. That's why I made that playlist."

Luke can't contain the smile this time around. It's absurd how quickly it spreads across his face. 

"You're incredible, you know that?"

(If only he could have felt the heat spread across her neck and chest…)

"I think you've told me once or twice." There's a hint of mischief in her voice that makes him laugh. 

His hand falls from her neck, and she lets out a breath she hadn't realized she'd been clinging to. Luke reaches to the side to pick up the forgotten earbuds and hands one back to her. He slips the other into his ear and waits expectantly. 

"Show me what else you put on this list." It is a demand, but the excitement in his voice and in his gaze momentarily makes her forget what that pout looks like. She nods and picks up her phone to find the next song to play. 

The two of them settle back into their rightful places beside each other. Her eyelids start to get heavy the longer the night goes on. His arm rests beneath her head, anchoring it to his chest, and she wonders how she could explain sleeping out in the garage to her father in the morning. Eventually, they've cycled through every song she'd picked. The silence rouses her just enough to look up to him, only to find his eyes closed and expression beautifully relaxed. She moves as slowly as possible to shuffle another playlist just to fill the stillness and nestles a bit closer. 

"You can play whatever you want, just please don't play that country thing you made for Reggie."

His voice rumbles deep from within his chest, and the laugh that answers is heedless. 

Julie sets her library to shuffle and closes her eyes against the dim lighting in the loft. She could wake up early, sneak back inside, apologize to her dad for getting lost in the music. It wasn't exactly a lie. 

But for now, she was happy to fall asleep imagining that the base thrumming gently in her ear was Luke's heartbeat.


End file.
